Yes, lords and ladies, this edition marks the beginning of our 60th year of helping our readers oppress the working masses! I remember my first day here, starting as a low-level whip cracker fresh out high school, armed only with a sense of self-entitlement and the blessed nepotism of my father, ...
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Now that Christmas 2017 is over, I feel like I can come to grips with what happened to me this year and tell my story. I went to my apartment’s leasing office a few days before Christmas to pick up a package from Amazon. Everything seemed normal. The office was festive enough, appropriately decorated ...
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Hello there “real” Star Wars fan. Tis I, the malevolent Force behind the destruction of your childhood. You can call me Bob for short. Don’t think I haven’t seen your angry reaction to The Last Jedi. I’ve seen your online petitions. I’ve read your angry rants. I’ve watched your ...
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I don’t know what I expected out of The Last Jedi but it wasn’t this. Here are the top 10 things that blew my mind about the latest Star Wars movie, which I have not yet seen. If you think the Ewoks forgot all about the deaths on Endor at the end of Return of the Jedi, you’re mistaken. ...
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His name is Matthew, just like the first book of the Bible. That is how he introduces himself. I guess he doesn’t count the Old Testament. He asks what breed our dog is then gives her a vigorous scratch behind her ears. She approves. Matthew looks to be in his mid 30s but it’s hard to know for ...
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I got a star on my car and one on my chest, A gun on my hip and the right to arrest I'm the guy who's the boss on this highway So watch out what you're doin' when you're drivin' my way -Junior Brown Scofflaws. Criminals. Lawbreakers. Call them what you want; I call them scum. I’ve ...
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