Much like a dog or a small child, the dregs who haunt the cubicle foundation of a corporate empire need boundaries. Without a clear-cut set of rules and regulations to live by, your employees will float aimlessly from paycheck to paycheck. The usual dress codes, attendance policies, and so on, are ...
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Keeping up the appearance of communication is vital to keeping the slags happy and productive. But as any overlord worth his six figures will tell you, real information is best kept under lock and key. And the key is best kept under the close supervision of a highly paid advisory committee, consisting ...
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Ever wonder what separates a real corporation from some schlub with a small business and a cheap lawyer? The answer is a mission statement. Nothing gives the impression of corporate power and prestige like a well-worded mission statement. But before you go grab a fresh Crayola and start spilling words ...
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They go by many names. Pencil pusher, stapler jockey, cubicle monkey. Here at The Oppressor, we call them slags. As much as no one really cares about them, they keep the wheels turning. Without an army of office drones on the payroll, even the most powerful and corrupt evil empire would crumble like ...
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Yes, lords and ladies, this edition marks the beginning of our 60th year of helping our readers oppress the working masses! I remember my first day here, starting as a low-level whip cracker fresh out high school, armed only with a sense of self-entitlement and the blessed nepotism of my father, ...
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Now that Christmas 2017 is over, I feel like I can come to grips with what happened to me this year and tell my story. I went to my apartment’s leasing office a few days before Christmas to pick up a package from Amazon. Everything seemed normal. The office was festive enough, appropriately decorated ...
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